Have you been trying to hold onto some people who do not want you in their lives?
Do you feel frustrated by the whole experience?
My wonderful friend Darlene Arden used to use a phrase that I love! SCREWEM!!!
If it's not meant to continue, why struggle with people who simply don't want you around?
When I was a child, my primary caretakers did not give me wise training or HEALTHY role models.
I believed that it was more important to be liked than to have my own opinions. As an older teenager,
I REBELLED! Neither was wise or right for me.
It has taken me eons to learn the following:
IF YOU DONT WANT ME IN YOUR LIFE, THEN,
I DON'T WANT YOU IN MY LIFE!
NO NEED TO BEG, DO FAVORS, BRIBE, CHASE AFTER WITHOUT BEING RESPECTED AND LOVED.
People have their own agendas. Some are so busy with today's insane lifestyles, they have no time for you. Some think you are too poor/rich for them and shun you. Some think they are too smart to be near you, or make any effort to communicate. This really is their right to do.
It is also my right and yours, to say... "Enough is enough! I no longer wish to try."
For those of you who go away with something of value from this heartfelt blog, I am so happy to have made a positive addition to your lives. For those of you who couldn't care less about my sincere thoughts and feelings, go in peace!
I did my best, and sometimes, my best simply is not good enough for everyone!
HOLY WOW! Dr. Yanez, you hit it right on the nail-head!
ReplyDeleteThank you from my heart and soul. you cannot imagine what a big favor you did for me. LD Canada
Not in a million years would we have expected you to touch this particular subject. Thank you. I appreciate your honesty. Reverend P.
ReplyDeleteConsidering that my husband and I are both thinking about breaking off with some very mean relatives, this writing comes at an important time for us. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteThe Jones Family
If you have given it your best, then good luck. Dr. Y
DeleteCan you write more in this realm? Please? Velvet
ReplyDeleteSince you are discussing something very pertinent in my household now, I have a question. We know people who borrowed money from us and then stopped speaking to us.
ReplyDeleteAny wisdoms?
YES! Be thankful that's all they did to you. For me, it would mean a break. You must do what your heart tells you to do. Dr. Y
DeleteWe have family members who completely stopped speaking to us. When we try to communicate, they are too busy. Any advice?
ReplyDeleteYES! Believe them. Move on. If they want you in their lives, they'll let you know. Of course, if you dislike how they have treated you, you could also just dump them. I also do understand people who have lifestyles that dis-allow them relationships. It is a lifestyle choice that people have the right to make.
DeleteThey miss out on a lot! Dr. Y
Thanks. Elizabeth
ReplyDeleteBig Heart :-) Jenni from Belize
ReplyDeleteGreat advice! KP your Neighbor
ReplyDeleteWe love this blog b/c it is all about REAL relationships.
ReplyDeleteWhat if you want to give it one more try before dumping them?
ReplyDeleteBy all means, try to save a relationship if this is what is in your heart. Dr. Y
DeleteI have been rebuffed too many times. So I quit trying with my wife.
ReplyDeleteSad to hear this. Have you both gone for counseling?
DeleteThis is so true. A
ReplyDeleteNo one ever behaved this way with me. G.
ReplyDeleteDear G.... you are very blest. Dr. Y
DeleteYour advice is at times so valuable. BG
ReplyDeleteI have had the noted experience with two, one dead now; the other still married to my son. There is not much one can do to solve the situation if the "opponent" is determined. ANON
ReplyDeleteMy favorite quote from John Henry Newman says the same, perhaps in fewer
ReplyDeletewords:
*Fear not that thy life shall come to an end, but rather fear that it shall
never have a beginning.* Jim
Wise blog. Deb
ReplyDeleteVery nice to read. LR
ReplyDeleteNever had this problem. anon
ReplyDeleteThe reverse is also true – don’t keep people you do not want in your life! Nanci G
ReplyDeleteLove what this has to say. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteLinda
Many thanks Linda! Dr. Y
DeleteHH, THE DALAI LAMA, IS ONE OF MY HEROES. THANK YOU FOR MENTIONING HIM. anon
ReplyDeleteDear Anon.... My family and I had the honor of studying with HH adopted son, Za Cheoch Rinpoche.
DeleteNot only is he remarkable and well educated, but funny as can be. It makes the studying so much happier. Dr. Y